different symptoms

[Debbie]

I have been battling cdiff for a year now, and I thought I wasn't going to need to go back to the doctor.

I know I am an idiot for not going back to the doc after the three day rule. I have done the potty dance for about a week now. At first I tried the three day rule, and I wanted to see if I can just go for more fiber and two (one twice a day culturelle). I ran out of activia quicker than I can blink my eye for I ate that twice a day.

I was doing great and off the vanco for the umpteenth time for five weeks and 3 days to be exact. For me that is a miracle because the longest I was off was five days.

The symptoms are not as painful as it usually is, and right now to me its more of a nuisance. I do have a pain in my left side of my abdomin that only increases when I need to go. Over the weekend it was horrid. I went up to 20 times in one day. Today was much better for I didn't eat anything until late but did go potty four times today (once in the am and once in the afternoon) before coming home and twice but had it worse then!! Because I ate dinner. I am careful for what I eat.

Its not so much watery, but I think its because of the help of culturelle and the fiber. For as many times as I went I plan on seeing the doctor (which I was actually trying to avoid) I really want to go for it on my own. I plan on asking for the pulse dosing next. I haven't had a chance to look for a new doctor as I had planned from my last bout. I thought I was able to kick this with the boot. Its not so much watery (more of a bomb drop than the explosion), and very loose but with consistency, could cdiff still act like that? I think the blood is with the hemorrhoids that I get all the time now because not every time is bloody. its starting to get a very strong odor but not like when I first was diagnosed. Just like a smelly diaper kind of thing. I remember the cdiff smell and it doesn't smell like that. Any idea what may be going on?

Also am I being a little paranoid for wanting counseling over this? I get scared all the time when I hear someone working with D at work and they won't get the reason checked out, I also get paranoid when I get any type of sneeze (I do have allergies but I wonder at times if its a cold because either is hard for me to get rid of so I won't have to get on antibiotics for colds), I get paranoid over a lot of things associaed with anything that we touch especially in public restrooms or the ones at work. I do the precautions. I am afraid it may start affecting my husband with my paranoia. I am NOT obsessed, just concerned and cautious.

I know you're not docs but any idea would help! Thanks!!

[Nancy1]

Debbie,
It's good that you're going to see your doc. He/she should test you for cdiff ASAP, before you start vanco again. It's possible that you have IBS. About 1 out of 5 people get it after cdiff. But since your symptoms only started a week ago, after you were off of vanco so long, my guess is that's less likely. Other folks here who have IBS can tell you more.

Cdiff is a very scary and frustrating disease, so I think we are all somewhat paranoid after having it. It's normal! Of course none of us want to get sick, possibly have to take antibiotics, and then worry about getting cdiff again. If you want counseling, I'd say go for it. And wash your hands lots. Good luck.

[Sheila1]

Hi Debbie,
As nancy said, you should get tested right away. In the event it is cdiff again, you don't want to slide all the way to the bottom of that 'mountain' - it's easier to climb back up when you're only 1/2 way down.

It is possible to have active cdiff with semi-formed stools and even once a day (or less) bm's (I'm did my 3rd & 4th relapses). It's even possible to have it with constipation (though that's not the usual presentation of severe illness unless ileus is involved).

It is also possible to be positive and not have "the smell" though I've had it every time, there have been some who haven't.

This isn't a disease that you want to "avoid the doctor" with...if the "3 Day Rule" fails, get to the doctor.

It doesn't sound like you are any more paranoid than the rest of us..... my husband fusses because I make him wash his hands so much now; most of us have (or have had) all the fears you have. I finally decided, in order to remain somewhat sane, that I couldn't protect myself from the entire world, but I could do what I could - and let it go at that. It helped me quit fretting. Knowing some have taken a Z-pack without major problems has helped my fear of taking another antibiotic.

Take one day at a time - don't worry about tomorrow. Just work on getting through today and making it as joyful and meaningful as you can, that helps the tomorrow before it even gets here.

[Christina]

Hi, Debbie. So sorry that you are not feeling well again. This is one nasty illness. Twice I had made it just short of six weeks off of Vanco, by a day or two. It is very frustrating when things are going well and you feel your almost there and then all of a sudden it's back again.
Going once or twice a day even if you still test positive is not a big deal and most likely would not warrant treatment. Over time your body would resolve the issue on it's own. That's how we get "cured". Since you went 20 times, that would be more of an issue and like the others said I would also get tested immediately. I would suggest if that test comes out negative to do a couple of more for a piece of mind just in case it is a false negative. Especially, if your symptoms persist or get worse.
As far as smell goes I have not always had it with every relapse so I wouldn't rule it out by that standard. Blood is also another issue and hopefully, it is just hemorrhoids. I always had pretty severe bleeding with my relapses which would be my indication that I needed to jump back on the Vanco. Don't panic - just beware. That's all.
I commend you on wanting to speak with a counselor about your health. I think it is a wonderful idea. C-diff takes a toll on those affected by it not just the person who actually has it. Speaking to someone can help alleviate some of your fears and frustration. Luckily for me, my GI doc was a great support to me and my husband and still continues to be with my current issues c-diff has left me with. He understands our frustration. If I did not have him I certainly would've also turned to a counselor.Having someone who listens and understands is the best therapy one can have. Good luck and hang in there eventually it really will go away.

[Bobbie]

Debbie,
I agree with Nancy & Christina. You need to be retested. Now is a great time because you've been off Vanco. long enough. (See FAQ-Tests.) The 3-day test is best. Be sure & use a sterile (not just a clean) container.

You are not being paranoid about getting ill again & perhaps needing (God forbid) to take another antibiotic. Most of us feel the same way. If it would make you feel better seeing a counselor, go for it!

I, too, was off Vanco. 6 wks. twice & thought I had C. diff. licked. Not so. You will eventually "beat" it, however.

[Debbie]

THanks Ladies, I bought a four pack of Activia and I ate it for breakfast (two of them) and then I had the remainder with my lunch. I had a better day until this afternoon. I live in Florida and I was coming home from work on a beach highway, and OH MY! the traffic stopped completely and it moved most of the time about 5 mph and luckily moved up somewhat to 10 miles an hour. I see nothing but dunes (man made after our hurricanes wiped them out), and if I could pull over, I would have but getting back on the road would have been terrible and then MAYBE I would have been arrested for indecent exposure and LITTERING!! I hurt that bad! Not only that there were fenced in with barbs. I called my husband crying because I had the sudden urgency, and I have never held it that long. I just thank the Lord I was able to get through until I got home. I couldn't pull over to the gas stations because they were all full and far apart from where I needed (about five miles) and finally the traffic started moving, and I took a detour, left my husband at his work just to go potty. It took me about 30-40 minutes to get home for just 10 miles. I know it would have been worse if it were Spring Break. There was a wreck somewhere and I just prayed until the traffic would move.

I am also going to ask my doc for a referal for the counselor to see who he recommends when I see him in the am.

Thanks ladies for your support, your da' bomb! Ummmm, figure of speech. Poor choice of words for this subject?

[Jodie]

Hi! I too got soooo paranoid about everything when I got c-diff and then 10 times more paranoid after I learned my infant son had it as well. Don't delay counselling if you feel you need it. I still have c-diff 7 months later and my son just tested negative for the first time!! My doc had to put me on Lexapro and xanax because every little illness, sneeze, cough, etc was causing me panic attacks. I am much less anxious now and feel so much better just having someone on the outside to discuss things with.