Anxiety Post-C.diff

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CorgiGal
New User
Posts: 15
Joined: Thu May 31, 2018 8:32 am

Anxiety Post-C.diff

Postby CorgiGal » Thu May 31, 2018 9:29 am

Hi everyone! I joined today because I am at a difficult point in my recovery from C.diff and wanted to know if what I am experiencing is normal or if I'm going crazy.

I was diagnosed with C.diff in late March 2018 after being sick for over 3 weeks and was put on Flagyl for 10 days. Although I went into treatment optimistically, Flagyl destroyed me. I had every side effect I saw on the label except "seizures". I was depressed and crying throughout the entire treatment which is not me at all and had to be in bed for the entire 10 days because I was too weak and dizzy to move much. It was definitely the worst I have ever felt in my life.

I was in my 3rd year of veterinary school at the time and barely made it through finals. Afterwards I was fortunate enough to be able to delay my 4th year by a few months to go back home and recover.

Recovery has not been easy. It's already been almost 2 months since ending my Flagyl treatment and life has not returned to normal. Every week or 2 I will have what I am assuming is bad post-infection IBS for a few days that freaks me out because I think the C.diff is back. I now am afraid to go out to eat, out to the store, out anywhere because I am so afraid of feeling weak and sick while out of the house. I wake up with anxiety about the day, I worry constantly about if I will be well enough to go back to school. I don't feel like myself at all. Don't get me wrong, I get days when I feel almost normal again, but in the back of my mind I know in a couple more days I will feel ill again.

Has anyone else had crippling anxiety after battling C.diff? I am in counselling and have a rescue drug for anxiety attacks (an anti-histamine) but my quality of life is not what I want it to be, and I am afraid that I will never get my old life back. Does it get better or is this just what life is like now?

I was never re-tested for C.diff because my doctor said that testing within 6 weeks of ending treatment could give false positives, and to rely more on symptoms, which are currently not a 100% match for when I had C.diff.

Thank you for listening, I am sorry if this post has turned out too long. I feel so discouraged about this whole recovery, I am used to bouncing back from a flu or a cold within a week, but this is something I am wholly unfamiliar with.

Lisa33
Long Time Contributor
Posts: 2430
Joined: Mon Sep 29, 2014 1:45 pm

Re: Anxiety Post-C.diff

Postby Lisa33 » Thu May 31, 2018 12:56 pm

Welcome to the site - Please read the first forum for all new users on rules of posting, standard intro, etc. So sorry you had to go through this awful illness and its aftermath. Everything that you are feeling is completely normal. I've been there and everybody on the site has been there, or are in the midst of it now. The anxiety can be crippling. First off, flagyl is not even supposed to be used as a treatment for c-diff anymore. In my opinion, it never should have been. The side effects are completely awful for most, and many relapse after. The Flagyl made me sicker than the c-diff. It sounds like you do have PI-IBS. The anxiety can definitely be adding to your GI issues. I am not sure if you take probiotics, but for me they really did aid in my recovery. Recovery is very individual, but I ate gluten free for quite some time after c-diff, which I feel helped in boosting my overall digestive health and immune system. If the anxiety is preventing you from pursuing your everyday life, then you should definitely seek therapy. Many posters have needed anti-anxiety or anti-depressant medications. You should also talk to your doctor about your IBS issues as there are options to look into to help with the symptoms. Given that you are a couple of months out now, I feel that the odds are in your favor that you are not relapsing. It sounds like the anxiety because of the fear of relapsing and never feeling normal again is really the big issue. I can tell you we all understand and that you will feel better and this will be in the past someday. Recovery is the hardest part. As time goes by, you will see the improvement though. You have to get a handle on the anxiety and not let c-diff take away from you finishing school. To answer your question, this is no way what your life will be like forever. You should read through the success stories as it can help to see that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

NanciT
Long Time Contributor
Posts: 3035
Joined: Thu Sep 18, 2014 12:01 pm

Re: Anxiety Post-C.diff

Postby NanciT » Thu May 31, 2018 1:03 pm

Hello and Welcome to the site Please read the first thread for all new posters

What you describe is very common with this illness. First I want to mention your DR is correct about not testing, too often people are put on more medication and it can become a terrible cycle.
The fact you are having good days at this point is fantastic, you will find they become more and more.
I would keep an eye on your diet, that affected me the most with the post IBS in recovery and I am decided to continue on with a probiotic(VSL#3) which you may consider. It helped me a great deal with the IBS. If you find yourself with more IBS symptoms, there are medications that can help.
The anxiety is VERY difficult, I had a hard time like many others living in fear it would return( I did have 5 relapses over a year) and I found this so hard to deal with. Counseling is a great idea, relaxation techniques, meditation, and also understanding there is a GUT/EMOTION link. If you read the VENT section, you will read a great deal of anxiety.
Often it can just take time, the more you feel better as you reclaim your health.

I am sure others will jump in here with their suggestions

You WILL get there!

NanciT

CorgiGal
New User
Posts: 15
Joined: Thu May 31, 2018 8:32 am

Re: Anxiety Post-C.diff

Postby CorgiGal » Thu May 31, 2018 5:26 pm

Thank you for your kind words. Looking through a couple threads on this site, I feel less alone with this struggle with anxiety. I wish I had known about this site when I was first diagnosed as I would definitely have gone on dificid first instead of flagyl. It's been a learning experience for both me and my doctor. I am honestly surprised 10 days of flagyl worked as well as it has (*knock on wood*), I couldn't have handled even another day of those awful side-effects.

I will look at that probiotic VSL#3, I had not heard of it. I took a refrigerated lactobacillus probiotic, a non-refrigerated kyo-dophilus probiotic, and yogurt twice every day when first recovering. I am now on just the kyo-dophilus daily and yogurt a couple times a week, a multi-vitamin, and I am thinking about adding kefir too since I've heard a lot of people here have good luck with that.

I can't even begin to imagine going through 5 relapses, that must have been an absolute nightmare. I'm glad you are feeling better!

NanciT
Long Time Contributor
Posts: 3035
Joined: Thu Sep 18, 2014 12:01 pm

Re: Anxiety Post-C.diff

Postby NanciT » Thu May 31, 2018 5:46 pm

It sounds like you are on plenty of probiotics, too much can cause issues. I started with VSL#3 and have stayed on it.
The one thing that can really cause issues for me is diet, even still after years.
I am sure you will find in time you will continue to improve and put all of this behind you
NanciT


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