Getting your mental health after c diff

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Jimmy40
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Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby Jimmy40 » Thu Apr 06, 2017 9:34 am

Hello everyone! I hope you're all doing well. And either recovered completely, or well on your way to recovery from c diff and it's effects. I have recovered from the c diff. But the other things that it has left behind still get to me. I have learned to cope with the ibs, the Eczema, and the other physical issues it caused during and after. So I guess I am still in recovery. But my mental health is declining at a rapid pace. I worry and fear every day of something new. Some new illness. C diff really made me see and realize my mortality. I am seeing a mental heath specialist. And before my doctors tried some medications for anxiety. Which I cannot think of all if them off the top of my head. But they all had horrible side effects. Which is another thing. I had no side effects to anything before c diff. I am scared all the time. On edge. Every ache and pain seems to put me in a tailspin. It wipes me out. My energy levels are low much of the time. And it makes me wonder if it's some physical illnesses or if it's all mental? And of course contracting c diff again is always in the back of my mind. Because I am sure at some point I will need antibiotics for something. Many of you have helped me through my time with C diff. And have given me great advice. Especially what probiotics to takr and foods to eat. If any of you deal with Anxiety or did please let me know how you're doing? And how you are able to cope with it. I really want to defeat this without medications. But it gets harder every day. I was never like this before c diff.

justme
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby justme » Fri Apr 07, 2017 10:54 pm

Hi Jimmy:
Coping with the fallout from C.Diff is difficult at best. Fear and anxiety of a recurrence is probably uppermost in the minds of most of us. It has been 4 years since my recovery from C. Diff and IBS is a lingering problem. It is good that you are seeing a mental health specialist and hopefully he/she will be able to help you. I take a very low dose of Xanax for anxiety when it is needed (and usually cut it in half). What helps me the most is to keep my mind occupied and to try not to dwell on the possibility of a recurrence. I also do everything possible to avoid antibiotics and only take them if absolutely necessary. If they have to be taken, I take as low a dose as possible and use probiotics (even though my body hates them) before, during, and right after the infection or medical procedure. Also try to keep yourself well hydrated all the time, take vitamins, exercise, and take precautions to avoid getting something that will require antibiotics. I use a saline nasal rinse 3 times a day to deter a nasal infection, take vitamins to help my immune system, get flu shots yearly, get enough sleep, wash my hands a lot, and try to avoid people who are sick. As time passes and the further away you get from your bout of C. Diff, the anxiety should lessen. I wish you the best and hope you find a way to cope with the anxiety, but sometimes taking a mild medication for it is not a bad thing, although you should find one that has the minimum amount of side effects. Good luck and keep us posted.
Much aloha,
Anne

NanciT
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby NanciT » Sat Apr 08, 2017 1:05 am

Jimmy

I am sorry you are going through this, often once we get rid of CDIFF, the fallout can be very difficult. I am happy you are seeing a Mental Health provider, talking to someone about this can really help. I have been a Healthcare Provider for over 25 years, until I had this illness I honestly had no idea what something like this can do to our emotional health. Going through this experience has taught me many things. Time and time again we have posters here who become desperate for gaining their life back. I can assure you that YOU will and it takes time. Although I also continue to have POST IBS and other issues, I remind myself everyday I am on that road to recovery.
There are many things I did through tis process. Start a journal, set time everyday for relaxation music ( I like the Ocean sounds), go for a brisk walk,
if you are having a particularly bad day find a funny movie. It can get very frustrating but it sounds like you have reached out for the help and also made the effort to try medication...you are doing what you can. I think it can get down to Time....it takes time not to let these fears take over. The more " normal everyday" things you can do..the better.
Take Care Jimmy....you WILL get there
NanciT

Tsc1964
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby Tsc1964 » Sat Apr 08, 2017 11:46 am

Sorry to heal your dealing with these issues. Altho they seem to be very common to cdiff. Ive had periods in my life with fleeting anxiety but never experienced it to the level that cdiff brought it on. It was relentless an constant all day long during active an while on meds. I take xanax but it wasnt touching this anxiety i think some of it was absorption issues . I seen counselor a bit, used self hypnosis videos off youtube i did eft tapping which can also find videos in youtube it helped an got me thro. My mind went places that wasnt me at all . Im.almost 3 weeks post fmt an still my mental health is not great. I look back at November thro February an it is terrifying to see how fast i went down hill. I think we can also get a form of ptsd from being so sick an weak losing control of strength was scary for me. I finally broke down an went on low dose celexa in march, was afraid of side effects because usually severe with me but knew had to do something my mind was to dark an anxious. It has taken the rough edges off anxiety slowly building to theraputic dose. Still mentally dont feel like me an working to regain the strength an muscle i lost is frustrating that its not moving as fast as i like to. Your not alone in your feelings. Maybe try the youtube videos i suggested may help also congenitive behavioural therapy cbt for anxiety videoes may help. Wishing you the best.

kayron
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby kayron » Sun Apr 09, 2017 8:45 am

Jimmy10, I was going to make a new post until I saw your post about your anxiety after cdiff. I am just like you. I was sick all last year battling with cdiff (pseudomembraneous colitis). I have had Flagyl and several rounds of Vanco including the taper. I took Enteragam (binder for toxins). I have a terrible case of anxiety/panic, OCD even before I got sick with cdiff. I have had oral lichen planus (inflammation with white patches inside your month), interstitial cystitis (inflammation inside you bladder), hypothyroid, acid reflux and took proton pump inhibitors for a long time and IBS. This was all prior to cdiff. I took probiotics during and after the antibiotics. I actually have been seeing a psychiatrist before and after the cdiff. You are right when you think you have all kind of ailments. My panic disorder has gotten worse. I have rashes and cysts and I really don't know where they are coming from. I have been disillusioned by doctors because they were late in diagnosing my cdiff. I am having some topical cysts on my breast and I have in my mind that I have inflammatory breast cancer. Years ago I had fibrous tissue that they thought was breast cancer and turned out it wasn't. I am going to call my PCP and start with a mammogram. Oh yes, I went to the dermatologist and had several moles removed because I thought they looked suspicious. Everything is driving me more crazy. It is like did cdiff play with my mind or is it just my anxiety getting worse. I did read an article about over production of mast cells which are linked to the immune disorders that I have. I just want you to know you are not alone in this. I actually called a crisis line because I needed to talk to someone. Can cdiff do further damage to your body to make all these strange illnesses. Last year I lost close to 50 lbs. I have gained a little back, but I am still thin.

Jimmy40
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby Jimmy40 » Tue May 09, 2017 5:53 pm

I really appreciate all of your kind words and support over the last year and a half. I pray for you all. It's crazy how much just the fear of getting c-diff again can destroy a person's psychological structure and manifest to physical. Again I pray for you all. For all of us to never get this illness ever again.

Acres
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby Acres » Wed May 10, 2017 8:17 pm

Hi,
I deal with fear and extreme anxiety of becoming sick and needing an abx.... I do not shake hands anymore and if someone is coughing I run the other way. Everytime I get pain somewhere or a scratchy throat I think the worst....That's my lasting mental gift from c diff...
I see a therapist, have a very understanding wife and one of my best friends had c diff a couple of years ago so we talk about all the tmi topics together.....I have a good support system in place (I am very lucky).....Having someone to talk with has been a godsend for me....
I believe without that support I would be in bad shape.....

Hiking with my dog, listening to music in bed and keeping very active help me to relax and not dwell on my issues....
It's not easy dealing with the mental aftermath of this disease....
I drink chamomile tea (calms me) and will take Xanax .25 if I feel overwhelmed....

I picked up my acoustic guitar again after years of it gathering dust. It's been a source of joy for me...
I try to make up my own songs - A fun and challenging hobby....Something to fill my mind with positive thoughts...
Scott

beth22
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby beth22 » Thu May 11, 2017 2:17 am

I, too, have acquired phobias after c diff. I avoid sick people. If someone near me coughs, I go the other way. What I find though, is that if I keep busy, it helps a lot. When I have a lot of time on my hands, which is not often, I tend to think about things too much and my symptoms seem to come to the forefront. Try doing something that you enjoy - walking, hiking, reading, exercising, going to a movie, getting together with friends.

Chamomile tea helps me too. I have it before I go to bed and in the afternoon, I drink mint tea. Both are good.

Jimmy40
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby Jimmy40 » Fri May 12, 2017 8:58 am

I am happy to hear that you all have a great support system. And have great ways of dealing with your anxiety. Mine is at an all time high right now because I'm back on 2 different antibiotics. I've posted about it since being diagnosed with bilateral pneumonia. Although the only real symptoms I had were chest and back pain. Sharp pain when took a deep breath or leaned over. And some night sweats. No cough No noticible fever. Been on antibiotics for 4 days now. And the the last 2 nights the pain was there again when I would first lay down. So of course I'm worried it's something more than pneumonia now. I did have an EKG, blood tests (rainbow. Whatever that means. I guess the basic blood tests?)chest Xrays, and a CT scan on my chest.But thanks to my anxiety it's manifesting worse. Plus the issues the Cefdinir and Azithromycin are causing. I have spoke with my doctors office and the hospital. And they both have said this is the course of action for this type of bacterial pneumonia. So I'm worried every which way I turn. Trying to give it to God. But it's so hard to do. I do not have a significant other. And my most of myfriends think I'm over reacting. So I try not to talk about it around them. You all are the ones who I come for support. I do see a therapist. Bit I don't feel she is right for me. Plus the hours she can see me are not good. My work schedule does not match up with their hours. I am sorry I feel like I'm whining. But I'm worried more is going on than just pneumonia. But maybe I am overreacting. All I know is that they say I need to finish this round of antibiotics. Tomorrow will be the last day for the Azithromycin. That will be one down. But the high risk one for c-diff I will not be finished with until next Wednesday morning. I am taking florastor twice a day. And 2 pills a day of vsl#3. Eating yogurt with live cultures. And eating pretty much a BRAT diet. With oatmeal and some honey mixed in. I think I am doing all I can. But it's got me stressed out to the max.

NanciT
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby NanciT » Fri May 12, 2017 10:27 am

Jimmy

I am so sorry you are going through this, when any other illness hits post CDIFF it all seems so much worse. We are often left with this terrible anxiety, I really can't explain it. I honestly would not know this even after 25 years in health care....until I got CDIFF. I think it's so difficult to deal with one must go through it to understand. Anyone who deals with reoccurrences can often be left with terrible anxiety. First CDIFF can turn your world upside down...then you battle through.....and it comes back. This process would take a toll on anyone's mental health. Have this happen more than a few times.....and here we are. I often don't write about my experience but I had NO anxiety before CDIFF and yet here I am left with constant worry between dental infections and my fear of antibiotics. Right now I am in a battle with GI symptoms after taking Iron....which was low due to CDIFF. So it's no wonder we all get frustrated. It's VERY tough for people to understand. I have a very close friend in healthcare and she is always asking" Are you STILL not feeling well?" It is a lack of understanding about this horrific illness and the battle it takes to fight it even well after we are CDIFF negative.
If the therapist is not the right one, find another. It's important to have someone you can pour all these thoughts and fears on who will listen and not judge. Friends and family can have difficulty especially when we become CDIFF free.....and we still have this terrible anxiety.
As you can see, there are many on this site who are going through similar situations.....we are here for each other to push through...we will get there it is taking far more time then I would have ever imagined.
Sending positive thoughts your way for brighter days..
NanciT

Jimmy40
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby Jimmy40 » Sat May 13, 2017 6:51 am

Thank you Nanci!
I think it's back. Woke up last night with the sharp pains. And continue this morning. Went once bit not watery. But This pain in my stomach reminds me of the pains from c-diff. Almost crippling. I don't know what to do if it is back? I still have to worry about the pneumonia as well. Amd have 3 days left on the Cefdinir. Would I finish out this round? And go right on Vancomycin? Or would they stop my Cefdinir short and put me on the vanco? Then I would still be dealing with pneumonia. I am praying that it is just a bad bought of cramps and gas. And nothing more than that. But I am fearful that it is more. That c-diff has returned. And is about to unleash it's fury on me again. I pray that I'm wrong.

NanciT
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby NanciT » Sat May 13, 2017 12:25 pm

Jimmy

You are completing the antibiotic treatment and people can often get GI issues with nearly all of them. Especially POST CDiff. Call the MD with concerns and if pain and symptoms continue but hopefully you will get through this and NOT have it come back.
Hang in there, I know how difficult it is and the worry is terrible. No WD is a good sign.

Hope you feel better soon
NanciT

kmr92
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby kmr92 » Wed May 17, 2017 2:28 am

I can relate to you very much. I too have so much anxiety that every little body aches puts me into a panic as well. It is great that you are seeing a mental health specialist and working on it. I think that will be my next step as well. The fear can be absolutely debilitating. I try to keep busy so my mind won't "think" so much, which is easier said than done. I try to get out of the house and if I am home I watch probably more tv than I should to just keep my mind preoccupied. I also love to read a good book. I pray your pneumonia resolves and for your overall health. Keep fighting.

layceeLu
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby layceeLu » Thu Aug 16, 2018 4:38 pm

This is HELL. I considered myself to be STRONG. However on my second round antibiotics. I had Flagyl in hospital after a four day stay and continued Flagyl all to see my GI a week later who stated the Medication DIDN'T WORK!! Now on my third day VANCO. I have lost 18lbs and my Mental Heath seems to be getting worse. I have SEVER ANXIETY/PANIC ATTACKS I cant sleep or eat. I have never been so depressed in my entire life. I had NO I DEAL C Diff could do all this. I FEEL COMPLETELY ALONE and SCARED that I may never be myself again. I have now on .5mg of Xanax which I HATE taking! I am already so weak and all it does is make me feel foggy!! PLEASE TELL ME I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE IS GOING THROUGH THIS???? I AM SERIOUSLY TO A POINT I WANT TO CHECK MYSELF IN SOMEWHERE!!!! I HAVE A BEAUTIFUL FAMILY WHO NEEDS ME A SUPPORTIVE HUSBAND AND THREE CHILDREN WHO I HEAR PRAYING FOR ME AT NIGHT. THIS IS BREAKING MY HEART! I FEEL LIKE MY FAITH IS STRONG I JUST WISH I WAS!!!

NanciT
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Re: Getting your mental health after c diff

Postby NanciT » Thu Aug 16, 2018 7:46 pm

Hello and Welcome to the site Please read the first thread for all new posters

First, I am sorry you had to find us and also go through the initial therapy of Flagyl so many of us went through. Hopefully the Vanco will work, take the medication and know it can take time to get back to "normal". If you are not taking a probiotic, talk with your GI. It needs to be timed apart from the vanco.
Go easy on the diet, stick with bland foods as you give the gut a rest. Yes, the mental health part of this can be terrible, you will find alot of support on the site.
You have posted on an old thread, you can write a new post to get more responses.

We do ask you not to use CAPS when writing, we all do know how difficult this illness is and are here for you

Hope Vanco will help you improve and recover soon

NanciT


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