Finally called my PCP about my anxiety

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MrsM25
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Finally called my PCP about my anxiety

Postby MrsM25 » Wed Feb 07, 2018 11:17 am

I’ve always suffered from anxiety/OCD even as a child. It was always manageable and mild but since being diagnosed with CDiff, my fear of health problems has been in overdrive. I find lately that I fear everything and I think I’m going to die all of the time. I am 5 weeks post FMT on Friday and my recovery is a slow process but I’m doing ok. My fears right now are of the flu epidemic and contracting the flu. I fear I will either need antibiotics or it will kill me. I am scared that cdiff has lowered my immunity and my anxiety doesn’t help. Since being diagnosed with cdiff, I am being treated by a therapist for my ocd/anxiety but he told me my case is severe and he feels I would benefit from both therapy and medication. He does not prescribe medication though so he suggested I contact my PCP. I’ve put it off for awhile because the thought of taking medication for it gives me anxiety!! I know, I’m a hot mess. But, I finally caved this morning and called my PCP and left a message for them. It’s crippling at this point. I fear taking my son to preschool because I think he’s going to get sick every time I take him. It’s so hard because I’ve never feared sickness until cdiff and my diagnosis of hashimotos last year. It made me feel like I’m not invincible. I always thought I was so healthy and had a good immune system. I’m a nurse and I was always around sick people with no problem. I used to go to the gym 3 times a week before cdiff and ate super healthy.
Anyway, just wanted to say that it’s time to bury my pride and to get the help I think I need to take a step forward in my life.

NanciT
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Re: Finally called my PCP about my anxiety

Postby NanciT » Wed Feb 07, 2018 12:30 pm

I appreciate you stepping forward with the overwhelming struggle many have in recovery. The fear is something that so many of us carry in recovery and we often recommend seeing a therapist and also an MD if medication is needed to help you through.
You are 5 weeks Post FMT and it does take time but you will get there and as time passes and you start to feel better and better...the fear will become less. But for now reaching out for help is always best.
I believe the Gut/emotional connection is a valid one and often those who have had relapses tend to feel this worse. I think the fact we get it back after treatment not only involves the Gut/emotions but also the mind. If you think about it as a nurse, we treat patients and often expect them to get better. We see it over and over and then suddenly something like CDI and if it returns and there is a relapse...that fear can overwhelm.
Wishing you the best, I see this as an important part of recovery for so many
NanciT

MKW
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Re: Finally called my PCP about my anxiety

Postby MKW » Wed Feb 07, 2018 12:57 pm

Hi, I finally went on Klonopin about 6 months post FMT. I kept having IBS symptoms which can involve fairly severe cramping pain that can last for hours. Yep, my brain just can’t NOT perceive that with a fear response, especially as a recurrent C Diff sufferer when I have to try to objectively evaluate every IBS attack for possible C Diff. I honestly don’t care if that makes me weak as a person... so I can’t cope I guess, so be it. They make anti anxiety meds for a reason. the klonopin helps, especially when I have to concentrate and perform at work no matter how much I hurt or how sick I feel. It at least tones down the psychological fear and physical panic symptoms like racing heart.
I had taken Xanax for two episodes before in my life. I had never taken klonopin before. I can tell you I prefer it and I believe it may help with my ibs spamming also. It has a very long half life whereas xanax is short acting. After months I have had no drive to increase my dosage and never crave it. ... be careful if your doc suggests an ssri because they can cause diarrhea. I did try amitryptilline a while back but it was too altering for me and made me wired instead of relaxed. Supposedly it can help with ibs but I couldn’t tolerate it unfortunately.
Good luck! There is a point people reach where they have enough of a problem that altering medication can make you more functional and not less. My doctor actually talked me into taking btw, he says I have PTSD.

MrsM25
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Posts: 133
Joined: Fri Nov 17, 2017 4:41 pm

Re: Finally called my PCP about my anxiety

Postby MrsM25 » Wed Feb 07, 2018 2:49 pm

I felt like it was important to share every part of my experience. Even though this is sort of a low point, it’s important that everyone knows it’s ok and they aren’t alone. I’ve spent months convincing myself of this. It really is a struggle. I’ve always felt like I was stronger then this so it’s hard to admit that I am here but I feel like I just need to take it for what it is at this point and get the help to move forward. Just thankful that everyone on here is always so supportive, encouraging and not judgemental at all. It’s so true that it’s so important that doctors and others see that this isn’t just a bowel disease, it also affects the mind and your emotions so much. There really needs to be more done to show the lasting emotional and after effects of cdiff. It’s so much more complex then people realize.

Ca5per03
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Re: Finally called my PCP about my anxiety

Postby Ca5per03 » Wed Feb 07, 2018 7:33 pm

I've been on Lexapro for about 2 month and see a therapist. Still scares the crap out of me. I don't even take tylonel unless it's bad, I hate pills. I haven't worked in 5 months cause my fear of cdiff and other stuff. Today was my first day back to work, it was hard, not going to lie.

Before c diff I thrived with stress, it helpt with my anxiety and ocd, being busy kept me out of my head and the anxiety at bay.

The hardest part is reaching out, I had to check myself into a house for anxiety, your so strong for reaching out! I hope your able to find you again soon!!

MrsM25
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Re: Finally called my PCP about my anxiety

Postby MrsM25 » Thu Feb 08, 2018 3:41 pm

I hope being back at work has gone well so far! I too thrived on stress for the same reasons. I used to be a nurse at a very busy specialty practice but am a stay at home mom now which has been tough in a way. I love being with my kids but it gives me more time to think and it’s been difficult being so sick and having no other options but to take care of my kids even when I’m feeling terrible most of the time.
My PCP office called back and they didn’t seem like they really wanted to handle it. They recommended I see a psychiatrist which I don’t want to do and I don’t have very great medical benefits when it comes to that. I already have a wonderful therapist who treats me specifically for the OCD/anxiety. This is why I try to keep going on my own without help because it seems so difficult to get help even when you ask for it. I left a message for my endocrinologist who treats me for my hashimoto’s/hypothyroid problem. Hoping that maybe they can help me? Still feeling super anxious, it’s miserable.

MKW
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Re: Finally called my PCP about my anxiety

Postby MKW » Thu Feb 08, 2018 4:08 pm

Sorry to hear that! Pcp’s Are fully qualified to prescribe for situational anxiety. I have heard a lot of psychiatrists now have nurse practitioners that you can schedule with for simple depression anxiety consultations. They cost less than seeing the doctor I think. You may want to just call around and see what you can find out.
Chamomile is the best natural remedy for anxiety I have found. I have used it in the past a lot.

shooten
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Re: Finally called my PCP about my anxiety

Postby shooten » Tue Mar 06, 2018 11:37 pm

Go on YouTube and listen to some of the relaxation meditation music. The ones that have binaural beats. You have to listen to them with headphones. I do this and it really helps to calm me down. I have also found practicing tai chi to be helpful.

MrsM25
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Posts: 133
Joined: Fri Nov 17, 2017 4:41 pm

Re: Finally called my PCP about my anxiety

Postby MrsM25 » Wed Mar 07, 2018 12:14 am

Thanks! I was finally able to get my PCP to prescribe me an antidepressant. I also found out today that my thyroid is off again so I will have to see if my endocrinologist adjusts my medication. Going to therapy helps and my therapist said that they are offering a meditation class this month. He recommended I try it. I may just do that.

Bobbie
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Re: Finally called my PCP about my anxiety

Postby Bobbie » Wed Mar 07, 2018 3:59 am

Good for you. I think we should all take medication classses.


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