Relapse and I Feel Lost

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ShannonS
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Joined: Tue Nov 20, 2018 7:45 pm

Relapse and I Feel Lost

Postby ShannonS » Fri Feb 08, 2019 7:12 pm

Hi everyone,
So I relapsed. Quick history: I originally had C Diff the end of November of 2018, and was on Flagyl, couldn’t handle the side effects, was hospitalized for 2 days, switched to vanco and took it for 12 days. Last dose was December 4, 2018.
So now 2 months later I relapse, and I’m feeling lost. I feel depressed. I feel numb. I just sit in my room and cry, and watch tv. I feel nauseous. I try to get down some soup and ginger ale, but I have to force myself to eat. I don’t want to interact with anyone. I haven’t worked in a week since I started the symptoms back. I’m glad my boss is understanding.
I started vanco again last night, but at a higher dose and it’s a taper. I’m also taking the liquid form which tastes nasty, but I know I must take it.
I don’t know what to do. I feel like I’m a burden on my husband even though he tells me I’m not, that he’s here in sickness and in health. I feel like I can’t be a mom to my 2 kids. I feel like I’m letting everyone down.
I’m trying to get a primary doctor right now, but it’s hard because I have no insurance. The last couple of days I just didn’t care. I’ve just started the vanco again, but I already have anxiety that this round won’t work either. I don’t remember feeling this bad mentally the first time I had c Diff. Thanks for letting me vent on here.

beth22
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Joined: Tue Apr 07, 2009 2:23 pm

Re: Relapse and I Feel Lost

Postby beth22 » Sat Feb 09, 2019 2:20 am

Many of us have felt the way you do, but just take it one day at a time. Liquid vanco is good and a lot of posters have done well on a vanco taper and have been cured. I think a taper is better than stopping after a certain number of days. You should start to feel better in a few days after the vanco kicks in. There is also Dificid, which is very, very expensive, but the company has a program that helps people that do not have insurance or money. Several posters have gotten the medication free of charge this way. That is another alternative and one that you hopefully won't need, but I thought I would mention it so you know about it.

NanciT
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Re: Relapse and I Feel Lost

Postby NanciT » Sat Feb 09, 2019 12:22 pm

First, sorry you are going through this. I agree with Beth. Many of us have gone through relapses and there is a terrible fear of " will I ever get rid of this" but you WILL. It can take time.
Since you mentioned you had been in the hospital did a GI see you at the time? You can check because typically there would have been one. If so, try and get in with that GI.
The Vanco liquid is less expensive as Beth has mentioned and there is a program though Dificid where you can get it at a much lower cost. Speak with your MD about it.
Hang in there. If it were me, I would look into the Difcid, it finally worked for me after many relapses

I hope you feel better soon

NanciT

roy
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Re: Relapse and I Feel Lost

Postby roy » Sat Feb 09, 2019 1:52 pm

Are the stool test results back yet?

ShannonS
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Posts: 25
Joined: Tue Nov 20, 2018 7:45 pm

Re: Relapse and I Feel Lost

Postby ShannonS » Sat Feb 09, 2019 2:29 pm

Thanks Beth and Nanci for your words of encouragement. I’m trying to take it one day at a time. My husband and GI doctor say the same thing to take it one day at a time.
Nanci,
When I was hospitalized that first time, I did see a GI. He was the one to switch me to vanco. I do have a regular GI though and I see her this Tuesday.
Roy, Yes it came back positive.
I just don’t know why it waited 2 months. The last time I was in a hospital setting was last month when I had a outpatient MRI of my abdominal area to see why I was still having nausea on and off. The only thing that came back was minor inflammation in my colon, but my GI wasn’t worried about it.

roy
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Re: Relapse and I Feel Lost

Postby roy » Sat Feb 09, 2019 3:43 pm

In another thread you say your on a PPI, has that been stopped?

ShannonS
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Posts: 25
Joined: Tue Nov 20, 2018 7:45 pm

Re: Relapse and I Feel Lost

Postby ShannonS » Sat Feb 09, 2019 4:36 pm

Yes I stopped the PPI last week when the nausea came back and I haven’t taken it since.

Musings
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Joined: Tue Nov 01, 2016 8:38 am

Re: Relapse and I Feel Lost

Postby Musings » Wed Feb 13, 2019 5:54 pm

Sorry to hear that you are experiencing a relapse. I, thankfully, did not have nausea during my bouts but my anxiety, and depression, sky rocketed in ways I never knew before the illness. Believe you are already on medication for your anxiety but my therapist at the time also suggested the following so maybe they can help you as well -

*Meditation
*Yoga (when/if you feel physically able)
*Watching comedies/uplifting TV shows and/or movies
*Try a new video game
*Read a new book
*Go easy on yourself (easier said than done - I know!)


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